Death approaches.

I witness it
close the distance
between us,
accelerating the inevitable
after we failed to secure
our first date.

I’m not the good guy,
I don’t meet the criteria
of bad either.

The unknown settles my fate
as questions
on what will follow linger.

I like the attention,
flattered that the afterlife
finds me attractive.

I entice it with my behavior,
wearing the most revealing
outfit that shows off my best asset.

I shouldn’t be leading it on;
acting like I’m interested
then backing out
at the last minute.

Some may call this selfish,
saying I should be responsible
for any consequences
because I’m the one that did it.

It has an appearance
that’s irresistible,
I found myself
giving in to the persuasion.

Seduced by its mysteries,
my current relationship
is on the verge
of break up,
and secretely,
I’m looking forward
to the occasion.

Please don’t take this personally or thoroughly to heart,
But
I hate you.

And I would rather not play the blame game
or point fingers at who tore whom apart.

I just miss you an irritating amount
that I’m sure will be alleviated as time inflates.

I constantly make these illogical attempts
to locate you in my memory and press erase,
But every time I try,
a new connection is formed and takes its place,
Resurfacing your face,
An obnoxious amount that leaves me in my present state.

I entertain the thought that maybe I’m doomed,
and you were the one that got away.
But I also acknowledge that billions of people
are on the planet,
and someone out there could be just as great.

Part of me doesn’t want to invest the time
because I was satisfied with how we played.
So maybe in the end,
we were meant to be delayed.

But you tell me.
I lost touch with who you are.
I wasn’t totally as honest as I could have been
or as I was in the start.

I mean…
You weren’t either,

But it’s nothing we can’t restart
Because at this point,
I may be willing to forgive any hurt in my heart.

I search and wait,
hopefully for a subtle sign
or a light bulb of some sort
that could tell me we would be just fine.

I guess I’m being silly.
I must be completely out of my mind
because realistically speaking,
I can’t count how many times
I’ve attempted to reconnect for the sake of our minds,

or maybe
just mine.

I can take the hint,
But I struggle to solve the rhyme
because no one told me
when you fell in love,
you would be eventually forced to climb.